The Death of Guy?

It is my duty, privilege and honor to announce the dutifully, privileged and
honorable death of one sourly missed bastard of a boss, Mr. Guy Johnson.

After a severe case of insomnia, Mr. Johnson went into the big sleep.  It is
unclear what exactly did it, his addiction to toxic chemicals (he often was
found huffing gas underneath his desk), the fact that he was 300 pounds over
weight, or the fact that secretly he wanted to be a woman (I read his
diary).  What is known is that Mr. Johnson is no longer available for
comment; he kicked the bucket right after he tossed his cookies, bought the
farm and then... oh hell, you get the point.

It's too bad Johnson ain't have no bastard children to take over the
business, so it looks like I'm going to have to fill his shoes.  Damn weird
shoes too.  He wore a size 9 on the right and a 7 on the left, I never
noticed that about him.

Anyway, I'm required to inform you that pending an FDA investigation into
the death of Mr. Johnson, the production of Zarsisipan will be discontinued
indefinitely.  Thank you for your loyal support.

the janitor



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